So This Is Goodbye
by Rabidnar
Summary: This was purely Aubrey without the distortion of alcohol. And Chloe was lost in how much more she never wanted to let go of her.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Pitch Perfect or the characters! I should also probably start adding that I don't own the lyrics at the beginning (and end?) of each story. But I do recommend you listen to the songs! This story was based off of Best Days by Graham Colton and Goodbye by Ke$ha.  
**Beta'd By: **Vanamo! (Duh.)

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**So This Is Goodbye**

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_I count the steps, the distance to the time when it was me and you,_  
_So far gone._  
_Another face, another friend, another place, another end,_  
_But I'll hang on._

* * *

They had to be gone by noon the next day, and it had taken Aubrey all of two hours to put her already organized stuff into boxes. Chloe straggled behind, like she did every year, trying to fit clothing into containers with CDs and a stack of books into a box half the size she needed it to be. She tried to take comfort in the fact that this would be the last time she had to drag all of her shit out of the dorms. But knowing that she was going to have to somehow fit it all into her car just increased her frustration. Packing was the _one_ thing that she stressed over more than Aubrey did. Aubrey, with her perfectly sorted boxes and pastel colored labels, had moving in and out of their dorm room mastered by the second time they'd done it. She often even shooed Chloe off to the side and packed up her stuff too while she was at it. But this year was different. Aubrey had gone out, and Chloe couldn't seem to squeeze her hairdryer in with her DVDs. She found herself dazed out and just glaring at her belongings for longer periods of time than she spent packing them up.

It wasn't that Aubrey hadn't offered to help her get ready to leave. Her roommate had even taken it upon herself to help pack up Chloe's comforter and pillows, stating that they could just share a bed one last time, before there was a knock on the door that interrupted the packing process. Chloe had opened the door to Fat Amy, Stacie, and Lilly. They were the only Bellas left on campus, as they still had finals to take in the morning. Fat Amy had apparently rounded them up for a nice dinner and was intent on dragging Chloe and Aubrey along with them. Shockingly, it was Aubrey who didn't take much convincing, for once. Chloe could tell by the look on her face that she was in shock that anyone other than Chloe was inviting her out to dinner. Chloe had ushered her out the door, turned down Fat Amy, Lilly, and Stacie about five times, then went back to packing alone. She never cared much for tradition, but almost immediately, she missed Aubrey reminding her to label what was in each box. It never really sunk in that there would be a day when Aubrey no longer told her what to do. Every time she thought about it over the years, she always joked with herself that it would be a day to look forward to. She didn't think she would miss it. Not so soon, anyway. After all, it was only a matter of time before Aubrey came bursting back into their room and started lecturing her on how she should really pay more attention to what she was packing into each box before she repacked them all herself.

Chloe dropped her hairdryer on top of the DVD pile then sat down on the edge of her bed. If Aubrey was going to repack it all anyway, she suddenly didn't see the point in doing it herself. It at least looked like she tried. She could stand to stay awake the entire night with Aubrey repacking even though she had an 8 A.M. final. She almost looked forward to it.

The plastic bed cover crinkled under her rear and brought relief from the deafening silence. Chloe wrung her hands together and stared at Aubrey's stack of boxes. She suddenly regretted not joining her for dinner with the other Bellas. She wasn't hungry, but the company would have been better than her empty dorm room. She had never liked being alone. It gave her too much time to think. Despite her generally cheerful personality, her head could still be a very dark place. Aubrey's nearly constant presence kept her away from that for the past four years. People always thought she kept Aubrey sane, but in the end it was a two-way street. No one ever knew she needed Aubrey as much as she was needed by her. Not even Aubrey. Chloe managed to mask her anxieties and insecurities much better than Aubrey did. It also didn't hurt that she was someone who people always overlooked so long as she was around Aubrey. She liked to be in the background. But she didn't like to be alone. She shifted to make the bed crinkle again, just for a distraction.

Chloe looked at Aubrey's bed and started to wonder how many nights she would wake up and try to crawl into bed with a person that wasn't there. It had become a habit every night to either fall asleep in the same bed or for one of them to join the other at around three in the morning. Aubrey never wanted to admit it, but she had nightmares. Chloe never did admit it, but she did too. The two of them slept soundly together with their arms wrapped around each other in a way that made Chloe wonder if maybe they had become more than just friends. A lot of things made Chloe question if they had crossed over the friendship line. Aubrey never gave any indicators that she felt the same though. They both dated other people, mainly men, and never spoke a word of the number of times they kissed or had sex while they were drunk. If Chloe ever brought it up, she knew for sure that Aubrey would just brush it off. She suddenly found it hard to fathom that Aubrey's face would no longer be the first thing she saw when she woke up every morning. Aubrey wouldn't force her to go on morning jogs then treat her to breakfast afterward just to convince her to go running again the next morning. She wondered who would join her for movie nights and how many times a week Aubrey would call her. Would their friendship eventually fade out? The thought made her feel sick.

It was finally a picture still sitting on the nightstand that dragged Chloe away from staring off into space. She picked up the wooden picture frame and held it on her lap. Aubrey always hated the picture it held, and Chloe had to hide it on more than one occasion so she wouldn't throw it out. It was Chloe's favorite. For once, Chloe looked like the poised one and Aubrey looked so stress-free. It had been taken by their friend, who needed models for a photography class. The two of them were out on the quad with Aubrey standing behind Chloe. Her arms were wrapped around Chloe's mid-section. Chloe was staring at the camera with a closed-lipped smile and her hands resting on Aubrey's arms. She couldn't remember what Aubrey had been looking at, but something had been happening in the distance and the picture had been snapped while Aubrey was mid-laugh. It had been one of those true laughs too. The kind with the twinkle in the person's eye and their beauty being so bright that it had the potential to blind whoever was looking in their direction. Aubrey claimed she looked stupid, but Chloe thought she couldn't be more gorgeous than when she was smiling. It hit her like a ton of bricks that they may never get a day like that again and she didn't realize she had started to cry over it until a tear splattered across the glass.

Chloe quickly used her sleeve to wipe at the glass then scrubbed at her cheek with the back of her hand. She drew in a deep breath to control herself but the lump forming in the back of her throat had already become unbearable. How many times in the future would she look at that picture and know she'd give anything to relive that day? Chloe placed the picture gently on her lap then wrapped her arms around herself and looked up at the wall. Tears began to blur her vision and she quickly clamped her eyes shut to hold them back as she drew in a deep breath then let it out again. She pursed her lips together tightly and swallowed hard then opened her eyes and looked down at the picture again. Surely they would still see each other and continue to talk. She was being ridiculous thinking that Aubrey would just forget about her. They had lived together for four years! But she still found herself wondering if over time they would drift apart and their memories would fade. She didn't want to forget what Aubrey looked like or sounded like. She wanted to remember how her pillow smelled like her shampoo, the way she played with Chloe's hair when she was bored, and the glances they stole for reassurance. She lifted her hand to wipe at her face again. It always seemed like that day she had to leave her best friend would never come. It was like they would be sharing a dorm, stressing over school together forever.

The door flung open and Chloe tossed the picture off to the side of her bed. She wiped her cheeks with both hands.

"What the hell, Chloe?" Aubrey blurted out first thing as she scanned the room. "You haven't packed like anything. I'm not picking this all up for you."

"Uh, Aubrey…" Fat Amy nudged her arm with her elbow and nodded in Chloe's general direction.

Aubrey turned her head to face Chloe and her features slowly softened.

Chloe opened her mouth to speak then shut it again. She couldn't think clearly with all the worries swirling around in her head. She suddenly knew what Aubrey must feel like every time she got stressed because her stomach was turning circles. "Aubrey, I can't…" she choked.

Aubrey's brows shot up. "Are you being serious right now?" she inquired.

"I think she's pretty aca-serious," Fat Amy mumbled out of the corner of her mouth. Chloe had to wipe at her face again.

Aubrey ignored Amy. "Chloe, just put the stuff in a box and close the lid," she stated and folded her arms.

They were on two different pages. That was nothing new. Chloe nodded her head and got to her feet. She nervously rubbed her hands against her jeans. She thought that maybe she should resume packing but the Bellas were all staring at her and the tears were still burning her eyes. Aubrey looked completely perplexed by the tears that she thought were about packing boxes. "Okay," she whispered to herself to calm herself down. Her palms were sweating and she wiped them on the sides of her shirt. She turned in a circle and looked for something that would be easy to put away.

Aubrey gaped at her in confusion, as did Amy, Lilly, and Stacie. "What is wrong with you?" she asked.

Chloe cupped her hand over her mouth and tried to breathe. "Aubrey…" She didn't know what to say, at least not while the other Bellas were around. She couldn't tell if Aubrey didn't care about leaving school or if she was just being dense. Aubrey blinked and cocked her head to the side. She looked like she was searching for words, but she wasn't sure how to address Chloe's random outburst.

Chloe lowered one hand and then the other as she stared at Aubrey, waiting for a reaction. The silence echoed throughout their dorm room. "If you take your books out of that box…" Aubrey finally cut in.

"It's not about packing, Aubrey!" Chloe thrust a hand toward her unpacked stuff. Aubrey frowned. The other Bellas began to whisper and look back and forth between them. "It's about…us!"

Aubrey pressed her lips together and straightened her posture. "You're making a scene, Chloe," she accused in that calm, put-together voice that occasionally sent Chloe over the edge.

"Aubrey, you're not listening to me," Chloe bit back even though she knew she hadn't said much of anything.

"Does she ever?" Fat Amy mumbled under her breath.

Aubrey looked uncomfortably put on the spot. "I'm not a mind-reader," she said, keeping her cool, "And your stuff isn't packed."

Chloe sniffled loudly. She looked at the Bellas, who were staring at her intently, in hope it would give them the hint that they needed to leave. None of them moved. She drew in a breath and looked at Aubrey again. "You're right," she said and slapped her hands against her sides. "My stuff isn't packed, because once we leave, we are never coming back, Bree!"

Aubrey glanced around at their room and pressed her lips together to form a straight line. She clenched her jaw and tightened her arms across her chest.

The tension in the room thickened the air and made it difficult to breathe. "I don't want to miss you," Chloe managed to choke out.

Aubrey shifted her weight and momentarily gripped the sleeves of her shirt. She drew in a slow breath then let it out and looked at the ground before looking at Chloe.

Chloe realized that the entire conversation was going nowhere fast. "I find it hard to believe you just don't care, Aubrey." She furrowed her brows as she spoke and stepped forward, determined to get to Aubrey's feelings on the matter.

Aubrey's gaze flickered down then up again as Chloe started to close the distance between them. "We've been waiting to graduate since we got here," she stated matter-of-factly. She backed up against the wall as Chloe moved in closer. The other girls leaned forward to look inside the room and watch them.

Chloe stopped a few centimeters in front of her. "So the past few years have been about nothing more than graduation," she said with a slight nod. The fear that Aubrey might be serious caused her heart to drop. She had to look away.

"Chloe, that's not what I meant," Aubrey said firmly. She pressed her lips together and searched for words. "I'm just saying…"

But as Aubrey started to talk about how they knew they would be graduating and going their own ways for years now, Chloe didn't want to hear it. The way that Aubrey could logic things out sometimes made her crazy. She knew she was only doing it to keep herself and Chloe both calm, but Chloe didn't want to be calm. They were leaving the life they had come to love. They were never coming back. They might hug each other after graduation and it could be the last time they saw each other in person for years. She wanted to be sad. She had the _right_ to be sad. And after all the years that she had taken care of Aubrey when she was a hysterical mess, she had a right to be taken care of too. She stared at Aubrey with a look that demanded her needs be met. If Aubrey wasn't going to miss her, that was fine, although actually it wasn't, but she was at least going to have to deal with the fact that Chloe was going to miss her. Chloe thought she at least deserved that much.

"Jesus, Aubrey, shut up!" she exploded.

Aubrey and the Bellas all gaped at her. Aubrey furrowed her brows in offense. "Aca-scuse me?" she replied.

Chloe immediately regretted her words. She always tried not to picture her last day on campus, but when she did, she never imagined it would involve pissing Aubrey off. That would only lead to them definitely never speaking again. But she couldn't take it. She couldn't handle being the only one who cared. But she knew that Aubrey cared too. She had to. All eyes were on her and the room was spinning in circles, distorted by tears. She knew her next move was a bad idea the moment before she closed the distance between herself and Aubrey, but her need to feel and be comforted got the best of her. She took one step forward then pressed Aubrey back against the wall with her forearms and crashed their lips together.

"I didn't see that coming," Stacie said in confusion.

"I did," Fat Amy deadpanned.

Aubrey didn't hesitate to slam the door in their faces. She turned the lock while simultaneously shoving Chloe away from her. "Jesus, Chloe, you're starting to act like I'm dying!" Her voice rose an octave. "What the heck was that?!"

Chloe gasped as she stumbled back. The rejection pierced right through her and it physically hurt. She drew in a sharp breath and lifted the back of her hand to her lips as she looked back up at Aubrey. Aubrey had lifted a hand to her own mouth and was staring at her with an expression that Chloe couldn't quite read. She thought it might be anger, but if that was the case, Aubrey would keep going off on her. Instead they both stood there in silence and just stared. Chloe finally lowered her hand away from her lips and took a defeated step back. The tears were coming hard and fast, streaming down her face and dripping off her chin. They left dark splotches on the front of her shirt. She opened her mouth to speak, but she couldn't find the words she wanted to say. She felt used, always taking care of Aubrey but never getting a damn thing in return.

"I'm sorry," Aubrey finally spoke. Her voice was just above a whisper. It wasn't enough to convince Chloe to look at her again. Aubrey's hand began to tremble as she slowly lowered it to her side. She swallowed and drew in a slow breath.

"It's okay," Chloe choked. But it really wasn't. "It's okay." She nodded and sniffled. "I understand." She didn't really and her words came out spiteful. Her voice cracked and broke and she wasn't sure how she was still standing when she just wanted to curl up in her bed. Or in Aubrey's bed. She covered her eyes with her hands and took a few shuddery breaths to stop crying.

Aubrey exhaled slowly and loudly before there was a sudden change in her demeanor. She took a step forward and brushed Chloe's upper arms with her fingers so lightly that it made her shiver. Chloe dropped her arms limply to her sides as she allowed Aubrey to draw her in closer. She didn't question Aubrey's sudden change of mind. She just closed her eyes and leaned into the silent embrace, snuggling in closer when Aubrey's arms found their way around her mid-section. She already longed for the moment to never end.

Chloe's shirt had ridden up and one of Aubrey's hands rested on her bare side. The palm of her other hand was pressed against Chloe's mid-back as her fingers loosely entangled in the ends of her hair. Chloe would have given anything to know what was going through Aubrey's mind, but Aubrey was unusually silent. She seemed to be focused on breathing as her chest slowly rose then fell against Chloe's erratic gasps. Chloe felt like she was being smothered by the shoulder of Aubrey's shirt as sobbed into it and drenched it with her tears, but she pressed her body closer to Aubrey's as a silent plea to be held tighter. Aubrey's thumb began to trace circles on her side and she slowly lifted her arms and wrapped them around Aubrey's waist.

There were times when the two of them didn't need to speak. They stood in the same spot for close to fifteen minutes, but it felt like only fifteen seconds to Chloe. Her tears had dwindled but she sobbed dryly in protest when Aubrey's grip on her loosened and she slowly stepped back. Her arms fell from Aubrey's waist and she lifted her hands to wipe the tears from her face for what she hoped would be the final time. It was when she looked up that she noticed the tears glistening in Aubrey's eyes and the distant look on her face. She turned to face her as she walked away from her and sat down on the edge of the bed. Aubrey slipped her shoes off then fidgeted with her hands in her lap as she looked around the room at all of their boxes. She clenched her jaw and swallowed thickly then ducked her head.

Chloe took what was supposed to be a calming breath then walked over to the bed and took a seat beside her. She glanced at Aubrey's lap then took one of her hands in her own and laced their fingers. It occurred to her when Aubrey's lips began to quiver that it wasn't that she didn't care, but that she just didn't want to deal with coming to terms that they were leaving. Maybe she couldn't deal with it either. Chloe stared at her silently and Aubrey finally lifted her head to meet her gaze. She had gone from stoic to looking as scared as Chloe felt. "I don't think I can live without you," Chloe finally choked out. She searched Aubrey's eyes for some sort of hint that Aubrey felt the same, but Aubrey's gaze had lowered to her lips. She wanted to lean in, but didn't think that she could handle that kind of rejection again.

But it was Aubrey who made the first move this time. She leaned forward and captured Chloe's lips in a hesitant kiss that Chloe instantly returned with fervor. Her free hand moved to entangle in Aubrey's blonde locks and draw her in closer. She never imagined that the two of them would kiss when they were both sober and she could actually remember what it was like. Aubrey's eyes fell closed. Her lips momentarily parted and Chloe took the opportunity to slip her tongue between them. She tasted like an intoxicating mixture of raspberry iced tea and something that was just uniquely Aubrey. Even with the salty tears working their way into their mouths, it was still a welcome change from the taste of fruity mixers and vodka that Chloe had grown used to. This was purely Aubrey without the distortion of alcohol. And Chloe was lost in how much more she never wanted to let go of her.

The desperate need for air came far too soon and they broke apart at the same time. Their foreheads pressed together as they both panted and sniffled. Chloe glanced up but Aubrey's eyes were still shut. The desire to touch her became overwhelming and she lifted a hand and brushed her thumb lightly across Aubrey's cheekbone. Their lips met again and Chloe was suddenly cupping her face and pressing them closer together.

Aubrey suddenly made a noise and placed her hand flat on Chloe's chest, breaking them apart. "Wait," she breathed and pulled away gasping. Chloe felt like she had suddenly been snapped back into reality. Her eyes flew open and she looked up at Aubrey, thinking that maybe she had taken it too far. She looked into Aubrey's eyes and was caught off guard by the depth of the desire staring back at her. They were both breathing hard and quivering with overwhelming emotion. They stared at each other in silence, waiting for the other to confirm where they were going with this. Chloe could practically see the wheels turning in Aubrey's head as she tried to get a grasp on what they were doing.

"This won't change anything, Bree," Chloe tried to assure her. She didn't want to push her, but she wanted her to know that she had never let sex come between their friendship before and she wouldn't let it now. She couldn't deny how much she wanted this though, _needed_ it even. Her connection with Aubrey made everything else in her life feel dull and emotionless and she wanted to be overwhelmed and completely wrapped up in that bond before she had to let it all go. She could settle for even what they were doing now though, kissing and holding each other. Anything where they were touching and she knew that Aubrey was there and real. Something physical that she could hold onto.

Aubrey stared at her for a moment as though she wanted to say something but then just drew in a shuddery breath and nodded her head.

Chloe hesitated for a moment to make sure that this was what Aubrey wanted too. She would deny her own needs for Aubrey's. But the way that Aubrey was staring at her and waiting for her to make the next move reassured her that she wouldn't have to. She pushed herself up onto her knees and gripped the bottom of Aubrey's shirt. Aubrey pulled her arms in through the sleeves and helped Chloe pull it off. Goosebumps rose on Aubrey's skin as the air conditioned air hit her. Chloe leaned forward and placed several warm kisses down her shoulder. Aubrey's head lulled to the side to give Chloe access to her neck.

There were never many opportunities in their relationship for Chloe to be in control, but sex was one exception to that. The first time they slept together, Aubrey had been wasted, rough, and demanding. But after their trust began to build, she preferred to give in to Chloe having her way with her. Their roles switched from time to time, but Chloe preferred to be in charge. Something about Aubrey being completely vulnerable in front of her made her pride swell. Maybe it was that she knew she was the only one who ever got to see Aubrey will all of her walls completely stripped away. She was filled with a desire to protect her and let her know that she never had to strive for perfection around Chloe because she was perfect just the way she was. She kissed along Aubrey's jawline and smiled at the pleasured humming noise she made then pulled away and began to unbutton her own shirt.

Aubrey pushed Chloe's hands away and joined her on her knees. She began to meticulously undo each button, even after it would have been easier to just pull the shirt up over Chloe's head. Her hands pulled the fabric away from Chloe's abdomen and Chloe's stomach muscled tensed as she anticipated Aubrey brushing against her skin, but she never did. Aubrey eased the shirt down off her arms and Chloe grabbed it from her and threw it on the floor before she could attempt to fold it or something. Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion, but Chloe knew that it would still be over in the blink of an eye. She dipped her fingers under the waistband of Aubrey's jeans and pulled her closer so she could kiss her again. Their breasts pressed together as their lips met and Aubrey wrapped her arms around Chloe's torso and unhooked her bra then eased the straps down her shoulders. The article of clothing fell to the bed and Chloe quickly directed Aubrey's hands to her bare chest, closing her eyes as Aubrey's warm fingers brushed against sensitive skin. She trailed her fingers lightly up Aubrey's sides, grinning into the kiss as she shivered, then undid her bra and tossed it off somewhere to the side.

There was a rush of warmth as Chloe eased Aubrey down onto her back then straddled her with one leg on either side of her stomach. Aubrey's hands slid down Chloe's slides and came to rest around the belt loops on her pants. She stared up at her, searching her eyes for some sort of approval as Chloe leaned back and trailed her gaze up and down her perfectly fit body. Chloe looked up at her face and they locked eyes for a moment. She hated that Aubrey was secretly so uncomfortable in her own skin that she needed Chloe's approval that she was worth making love to – or even just being loved in general. She prayed that whoever eventually stole Aubrey's heart got her like she did and would spend every day showing her that she was amazing. She leaned forward and pressed her forehead against Aubrey's with a look of tender reassurance as she reached between her legs and unbuttoned Aubrey's pants. Her own jeans brushed uncomfortably against her inner thighs and her breath caught in her throat as Aubrey pulled them up further so she could reach the button with ease. The fabric rubbed up against her center and she fought the urge to press down against it to create friction.

Her fingers fumbled with Aubrey's zipper and she pressed her face against her shoulder as she had to move further down against her pants to push Aubrey's jeans off her hips. It occurred to her when her own pants didn't move that both her button and zipper had been undone and Aubrey was torturing her on purpose. It was made worse as she squirmed and both the scratchy fabric and Aubrey's smooth skin brushed against her. She gasped and desperately slid her hand down her own stomach and toward her own center to ease some of the pressure but Aubrey grabbed her fingers and pushed them away. Chloe tried to swear but the only noise that she could manage was a strangled moan. She shifted as best as she could and pressed her hips down against Aubrey's then placed a kiss against her collarbone in the place she _knew_ drove her crazy. Aubrey gasped and tilted her head back, trying to buck her hips up against Chloe's but was pinned to the bed.

Time sped up and in a sudden frenzy they were struggling to sit up and push each other's pants off. Aubrey kicked her jeans off the bed then flipped Chloe over onto her back before she could get hers down off her ankles. Aubrey did her the favor of using her foot to push them the rest of the way off. She leaned back with her hands pressed against Chloe's shoulders and looked down at her like she was just now seeing her naked for the first time. Chloe felt the confidence she normally held flee from her, but it was hard to concentrate on how self-conscious Aubrey was making her when the fabric of her panties were pressed against Chloe's stomach. She could feel how wet Aubrey was through the thin fabric and she moved her hands to rest on her legs. The smell of sex and of Aubrey's Cashmere Glow body spray sent a rush of warmth between her own legs.

Chloe pushed herself up on her elbows and Aubrey met her halfway for a kiss. She fell back against the pillow and arched her back up off the bed as Aubrey began to kiss down her neck and chest. Her worries were long forgotten as Aubrey's lips brushed against her stomach and elicited a soft moan from her. Aubrey took her time, sucking on the sensitive skin near her bellybutton then working her way down to the inside of Chloe's thighs. It wasn't until Aubrey was sliding down her panties and dragging her tantalizing kisses toward her center that Chloe realized she was going to go down on her. It wasn't the first time, but fuck it was so much better when she was sober and every little sensation was suddenly ravaging her entire body and making it harder to breathe. She let out a soft cry of pleasure when Aubrey's mouth finally reached its destination. She entangled her hands in Aubrey's hair and had to tense the muscles in her lower back to keep her hips from bucking up. Her attempt to moan Aubrey's name came out as only a drawn out "ah".

Aubrey traced her tongue in circles, picking up speed and then slowing down again whenever Chloe got close. She moaned softly and Chloe felt the sound resonating through her. She lifted her head and looked down to realize that Aubrey had a hand between her legs and was getting herself off at the same time. She wanted to help, but the image and the way Aubrey's tongue was teasing her rendered her useless to do anything other than rest her head back and tighten her grip on Aubrey's hair. She closed her eyes and breathed a silent cry when Aubrey brushed her hand across a ticklish spot on her lower stomach. She was so close and she knew Aubrey knew it, but Aubrey just kept bringing her to the edge and then refusing to let her come.

It wasn't long before Aubrey's movements came to a complete stop and she began to kiss her way back up to Chloe's stomach again. Tears of frustration began to sting Chloe's eyes and she actually thought she might start crying. "Aubrey," she half protested, half begged. She was so out of breath that she wasn't even sure her words were audible. "Oh god." She swore she could feel every inch of Aubrey as she worked her way back up her body and to her mouth. Aubrey pressed their lips together and pressed two fingers into her at the same time. The taste of Aubrey and of herself coupled with the sensation of Aubrey's fingers inside of her sent a rush of warmth through her stomach and she arched herself up against Aubrey. Her entire body burned with pleasure. She somehow managed to slide her hand between Aubrey's legs and the feeling of her tightening around her fingers sent her over the edge for a second time, even harder. She felt like she was being ripped to shreds in the best way possible.

Aubrey collapsed first and on top of her, pressing her flat against the bed. Chloe came down slowly and still felt like she was pulsating even after Aubrey slid her fingers out of her. She exhaled slowly then tried to catch her breath as she slid her arms around Aubrey and turned her head to bury her face in her hair. The pressure in her chest returned almost immediately and the tears of pleasure that had begun to well up in her eyes quickly turned to tears of grief again. She swallowed thickly and stared up at the blurry ceiling as Aubrey slowly pushed herself up onto her arms then rolled over onto her back beside her. Chloe turned onto her side with her back to her unpacked boxes and snuggled into Aubrey's side with an arm draped over her stomach. In a matter what would feel like seconds, she would blink and Aubrey would suddenly be gone. She tightened her grip.

Aubrey inhaled slowly and held the breath for a moment before shifting and momentarily wringing her hands together. "I don't know what I'm going to do without you," she blurted out suddenly. She turned her head to look down at Chloe, tears stinging her eyes at the reluctant acceptance that they would be apart.

Chloe glanced up at her. "You'll do fine without me," she assured softly. She scooted upward so that she could rest her head on Aubrey's shoulder. "But I don't know what I'm going to do without you either." She had never felt more at home than she did now with her and Aubrey wrapped safely in each other's arms. She drew in a deep breath and battled with the words that she had wanted to tell Aubrey since the moment they met. She knew that with one last night together, they might never have a perfect moment like this again. They lived hours away from each other. Their summer would be full of internships and then they would have jobs that would keep them apart. She slid her hand down Aubrey's arm until she found her hand and entangled their fingers. Aubrey's gaze was on her and she tilted her head up to lock eyes with her. If there was a now or never moment, this was it. How many people had the courage to properly say their goodbyes? She rolled over onto her stomach and placed a soft kiss on Aubrey's lips.

"I love you, Aubrey," she stated firmly. She wanted to make sure she always remembered it, even if they lost track of each other ten years down the road. "And I always will."

* * *

_Do I ever cross your mind?  
Cause you're on mine all the time._  
_I can't believe how unfair life is sometimes._  
_I'll find a way to close the door,_  
_And be okay with nothing more._  
_But I found you once,_  
_You're lost again._  
_2,000 miles took what could've been._  
_I don't want to, won't let myself, I have to realize,_  
_This might be, this could could be, this is goodbye._  
_This is goodbye._


End file.
